They look sad. First of all she should not have accepted a lift from a stranger as this is not a correct thing to do for any woman. Paying for treatment and medicine is one of the usual expenditures of life and a man is duty-bound to provide her with the necessary money. Always have a meal together. There are also many families with low earnings who live comfortably. Do not think that you are a slave in the chains of your husband, but realize that you are an ill man's wife. Spouses have every right to be guaranteed with sexual pleasure while making love. "The Prophet of Allah (S) stated: 'O you who express to be Muslims by tongue only but faith has not entered your hearts! Show your affection to him. The man says to his wife: "What a big and ugly nose you have!?" A man would also not like his wife to joke with men, A woman would not like this type of attitude of her husband towards other women. He can, through his own manners and attitude, influence her in a way that interests her in both him and his house. How to treat your Husband in Islam #Allah #quran #hadith #husband # I personally dont think its about the article regarding whether they are more male orientated or not but who actually puts it into practice. Stimulate (any portion of each others body), Avoid having sex before or outside marriage, Avoid penetrative sex during menstrual cycle, They strictly prohibited the consumption of pornography. Even after they marry their son off and apparently give him independence, they expect him to conform to their own will and wishes. [AdSense-B]. Because no one else is prepared to listen to their moaning, these men vent their problems before their families. No matter how difficult you husband is, treat him only with kindness. Wherever they, go and whenever they are in a gathering, they moan about the everyday events which have effected their lives it is as if they haven sent on a mission by Satan himself, to spoil the happiness of others. It will soften his heart over time, seeing the sincerity and love in you. 113. Be honest and open about your joys and fears. He stated: 'Yes, adornment of man (for the sake of his wife) helps her keep her chastity. Statistics and the daily news of criminal events all reflect this fact. A wife must always ensure to follow the Quranic paradigm while making love to her husband. It may seems simple but it's romantic and meaningful. She has trusted you extremely and that is why she has entrusted you with her existence. Consequently, the man finds his wife to be critical of him one day and begging him to do something the next day. If you enter your house and she does not salute you, you say 'salam' to her. the reasons for most cases of divorce are trivial and are not worth effecting the separation of a couple. 85, "Abdullah ibn Aban says: 'I asked Musa ibn J'afar (a.s) about maintaining one's family and he stated: 'Extravagance and niggardliness are both abominable. A step-father is often the cause of much unhappiness to his step-children. He cannot stay out for any length of time that he desires He should inform his wife of his whereabouts, etc. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "There is no obedience to any created being if it involves disobedience towards the Creator." Or, the worst fear - could he be cheating? I am aware of the difficulties that the youth are confronted with at this age, and I know that closing one's eyes to obscene scenes in the streets and elsewhere is not easy, but there is not any way other than to ignore them. After reading all the ways how to love your husband in Islam, now you have one more tips to have a happy marriage and family. 74, "In addition, the Holy Prophet (S) stated: 'Jibra'il (Gabriel) laid so much stress on brushing the teeth that I feared for them'." Whenever I talk to him about the work in the house, he interrupts me and says that I should not praise it before him. Feed her. This woman, while stopping herself from crying, is confronted with a problem which is so serious that the couple has decided for a divorce, so that she would remarry while he would have enough time for his scientific research." (11 Possible Meanings), Ways to Mske Your Husband Fall in Love with You All Over Again, Creative Ways How to Tell Your Husband You're Pregnant with Baby No. One of the causes of rows among men and women is because men mothers-in-law butt into their family affairs. "A dignified woman, around 35 years of age, says about her divorce request: 'It is twelve years that I have been married. Moreover, why should you blame your wife and children for your misfortunes? Oppressing a woman who has wishfully married her husband, who seeks comfort and tranquility with him, and who expects her husband to share with her problems, is not right. A person without a child or children would feel lonely and forlorn and would feel even worse in old age. A man, who is supporting his family, should know that a woman is also a human being like a man. Thus they can be a great deal of help to their parents when they are old. " And women have rights similar to the rights of men in a just manner, and the men have a degree (of advantage) over them" (2:228). Is this the proper way of doing things in your house? This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply. It is better to wait until later to have one or two children". If this is the case, then it is allowed to not comply with your husbands wishes. On the one hand, his honor is endangered and on the other, enduring such a disgrace is not easy. Therefore, when a mother-in-law interferes in her daughter's life, it cannot be meant to be anything but with good intentions. She should explain to him that she is only refusing because of the harm that is being caused to her, and that she is very keen to obey him and respond to his desires. They arc ashamed of having daughters and feel belittled. Have a laugh and enjoy their company. He should make enquiries about them patiently and not jump to conclusions blindly. Why should the wife obey her husband? - Islam Question & Answer I truly hate the sight of her'."36. A great responsibility rests with the father who should do his utmost to provide essential foods for his wife. This is due to the maintenance responsibility imposed on men by Allah. "The Prophet (S) of Islam stated: 'The best of your children are your daughters'. 97. Rights of Husband and Rights of Wife in Islam That is. A couple, who are troubled with this situation, should find time to sit together and like two honest judges talk about their problem(s). In the first part of this book, women were recommended to acknowledge this right. And:"The more civil and kind a Muslim is to his wife, the more. 64. A woman's habit that is hard to get rid of is nagging. The mother's nutritional habits together with her physical movements and psychological behavior are vital both to herself and the life of the baby in her womb. Do not make compliments to other women in front of your wife. Make a lot of dua to your husband, including when you want him to be a romantic person. Rather he should deal with her in a wise manner, and tell her to do things which are in her interests, his interests and the interests of the household, in a kind and gentle manner. Do not disappoint her during the difficult times. My mother-in-law started questioning me as to why I was late? They appear very smart in the streets, gatherings, etc but as soon as they return home, they change into worn out clothes. How To Treat Your Wife In Islam? (Correct answer) Children often suffer as the result of their parent's selfishness. Thank u. He even locks the doors for us when he leaves the house. It is not acceptable for a wife to refuse her husbands request of making love. Enjoy it with hi instead. He (the husband) is obliged to have intercourse with her, because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning): so as to leave the other hanging (i.e. The money that they should spend at home for the family, they waste at other places. Although many Muslim Husband and Wife relationships may right now be in failing and on a fast track to divorce and its terrible consequences, there are many ways to put their marriage back on the right track if they are sincere in their desire to reconcile thier husband wife relationship. This will ensure that you feel fresh and smell good at the same time. A housewife does all this work happily but she expects her husband to appreciate her and to show his gratitude. Wise people know that preventing oneself from forbidden looks would remove many potential dangers such as murder, crime, suicide, divorce, nervous breakdown, mental disorders, weakness or heart, anxiety, family rows, etc. Man has to care for her and her desires. Has he not heard of or seen any shattered families as a result of such behaviour? Do not get in strangers' cars. This is a general case and I think ninety-five percent of men are affected by them and the other five percent probably do not have a mother-in-law'. Hadrat Abu al-Hasan then stated: 'Do you like to see your wife untidy?' Is it not better not to spoil your family's happiness? Later, when I asked him to take the girls home he shouted at me and blamed me for delivering twin girls. Islam Q&A. 2, "A woman said in court that 'She was prepared to abandon her dowry and even pay her husband a sum of money to make him agree to a divorce. How To Treat Your Husband In Islam - Islam Nigeria It is both an Islamic and a human duty of husbands to do their utmost for their pregnant wives to provide medical care and facilities for an easy delivery. Allah (SWT) has commanded us to obey our parents and treat them with kindness. It is of utmost importance that you take all necessary measures to make your husband content. A girl also can become a prominent personality through your correct care and education. Islam is the only religion that raised the status of women and granted women respect and independence so it is contrary to say that one cannot find anything regarding the importance for man to respect a womans value. reason to move your husband away from you, tips on how to adjust with your husband in an arranged marriage. A wife's role in Islam is considered quite significant as she is the one that runs a family both physically and mentally. Also read:How to Control Sexuality in Islam. Also read:Muslim Wife Duties for Her Husband. She compares you with them and might lose interest in you. A validation e-mail has been sent to your e-mail address. Parents should not take sides with either husband or wife. Others would recognize them as silly and impudent. A wife in this condition might resort to drastic measures such as committing suicide. The Almighty Allah regards men as the guardians of their families and states in the Holy Qur'an that: Books on Islam, Muslims, Prophet Muhammad(s), Ahlul Bayt. Why is the lunch not ready? If they live like this, they would not enjoy their lives ever again, because a house devoid of family love and sincerity, is not a place of comfort. A woman also, similar to a man, undergoes emotional changes. They might not even bother to wash their faces before eating breakfast. They overlook the fact that they would degrade themselves through such deeds. Do some ways to please your husband so that he wont be that difficult anymore: Those are all the ways on how to deal with difficult husband in Islam. Be certain that if you look at your wife with a logical and fair view, you would see many good points about her. Allah would even increase a family's sustenance due to the blessings of children. . Now that she has left her parents to live with you, she expects you to be more loving to her than her parents. It is not correct for either of them to insist on something illogical. A woman, like a man, needs freedom and should be at liberty in her rightful associations. Treat him as a king in the house where all his needs is served. Here are the ways on how to deal with difficult husband in Islam: Every problem should be communicate to find the best solution. You and your husband should legitimately satisfy each others sexual urge. She sometimes pretends to be sympathetic and sometimes strict. This precisely means when neither of them are fasting. Therefore a divorcee would possibly have to stay alone for the rest of his or her life and may have to suffer from loneliness too. In the event of their suggesting or doing something wrong. If you do not agree with this point, then just take a look at the statistics of convicts. How can a man maintain a sound marital relationship with his battered and degraded wife? She, who was also tired of loneliness, agreed, and we now want to marry again'. She would lose interest in her house and family. She means to be sympathetic, but sometimes out of ignorance, she takes the wrong steps or makes harmful suggestions. Your children would not accept you either and would react by being malicious to you. Families, who are affected by this illness, suffer a great deal. Your negligence or reluctance can be a reason to move your husband away from you. Especially in argument, be patient and talk in a gentle manner that will pleased to be heard. "A fourteen-year old bride who had attempted to commit suicide said in the hospital. If you want to be treated romantically, then be a romantic person to your husband first. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: There is no obedience to any created being if it involves disobedience towards the Creator.. You should prioritize the Fajr Salah and not perform the Fajr Salah as Qadaa. The birth of a daughter would make a woman feel guilty and therefore she would keep silence because she was the one who has given birth. Are you not aware that your appreciation for her would encourage and refresh her? My husband works in a bank and his salary does not suffice our family. Some men, if they feel the cost of treatment is high, might even lose their wives. If either you or your husband is genuinely sick, in a grim mood or tired upon a mutual decision, you may refuse to serve each others needs. Create an account, If you do not have an account, you can click the button below to create one, Create new account "In the year 1969, out of a total of 10372 separations, 1203 women expressed the reason for their divorce as losing heart in life, feeling worthless, and the lack of care of their husband with regard to their wives' desires and emotional feelings." Build trust by sharing your thoughts and feelings freely with him. 1- It is obligatory for the wife to please her husband if he calls her to his bed. Would she not be disgraced in the eyes of your friends and relatives? Be ready to Serve your husband when he Desires One of the ideal ways to make love to your husband is to serve him sexually whenever he desires. 30, "A thirty-four year old woman emptied a can of kerosene on herself and set herself on fire. Thus his mother and sister(s) specifically feel offended. The more he steps in this direction, the farther he goes away from his parents. Why is that vase here? It might reach a point that even when she commits major mistakes deliberately, he keeps silent. For the sake of Allah and for the sake of your innocent children, be forgiving towards each other. Some people may eat too much or spend lavishly. They leave their wives and children at home and spend their nights somewhere else. Your children rely on you and look up to you for their happiness. In Islam, the success of a husband depends of his wife a lot. If he conforms with this responsibility then he would enjoy the company of a well-behaved, kind, moral, and wise wife. If theres something you dont like about your husband, talk to him slowly. Giving him nickname and calling him using those name is a form of romantic action in Islam. That is a man is duty-bound to pay for the expenses of his wife such as food, clothes, house, doctor, and medicine. 13, "The Prophet (S) also stated: 'There is no deed better than good behaviour'. On the contrary, your wrong approach would cause more distress for her. I am not saying that you should be indifferent or careless but that you should act upon the amount of evidence you possess and not more. They would hate you for ignoring their feelings and for turning the house into a dark place in which there is not a glimpse of happiness. "He hides himself from the people because of the evil of that which is announced to him. Our advice to the sister is that she should be patient with her husband and put up with it as much as she can, and she should note that she will be rewarded for that by Allah. 6How should a wife treat her husband? So it is not fair that when one gains independency, he should forget about his duties towards his parents. They blame them for their wives' disobedience and believe that their mothers put words in their daughters' mouths. Some men are suspicious and doubt their wives' faithfulness. One of the experts writes: "The baby's parents are able to either grow in a fortress of health or in the ruins of sickness. 3. Your house would always be in a messy condition. Pretend you are more concerned with her problem than herself. 49, "The Prophet (S) of Islam stated: ' Any man who permits his wife, who has adorned herself, to leave the house, is a mean-spirited person, and whoever calls him as such, would not have committed any sin. (b) Mental State: A mother, in her pregnancy, needs serenity and should experience a sense of love towards life. There are two aspects you should consider when oral sex is considered. How about if wife does not get ever satisfied and she does it every time only for fearing Allahs anger upon her?? But children from older parents might become deprived of their parents' guidance and teachings due to their death or disability. Such effort is contrary to the laws of nature and cannot be justified in any way. If your husband shows animosity towards any one, then you should break your contact with that person altogether. A couple who is not wise and prudent, might fall into the traps of such petty matters and apply for a divorce. According to the Shariah, for mutual simulation, a husband and a wife are allowed to . Events happen and show themselves one after another. (g) A man is not allowed to hit his wife if there are legitimate reasons for her non-compliance with his wishes. If you maltreat her and she retaliates, it is again your fault and not hers. But men have a degree over them. Al Baqara (2:228), Also read:How to Give Pleasure to Husband. Her husband is not satisfying her sexual desire. Thus if her husband still does not conform to his mother- in-law's ideal man, rows may break out between the couple which could result in divorce and even murder. When this arise, a wife should know how to deal with it, for the sake of the marriage. , " O you who believe! And live with them in honour and in kindness. An Nisa (4:19). Complaining about money is always a no-no and makes your husband feel he cant take care of you. A woman who works at home like a maid, deserves such loving care from her husband. "A woman, while holding a baby in her arms, said:, After four years of marriage I had two daughters with my husband, but since he wanted a son I became pregnant once more and again gave birth to a girl. Respect him and dont harass him. Halal sex comprises some key rules; these are as follows . She can be amused or made upset with little effort. Dear Madam! Therefore, a wise person is the one who is not affected by hardships. In brief, you should assist your wife and share in looking after the child. Dear Sir! You would still be suspicious. When their wives are young and good-looking they enjoy their company, but leave them when they lose their good look. May God save the wolves from her. Dear Sir! 87, "Musa ibn J'afar (a.s) stated: 'A man's family members are his dependents. When you find your wife in a state of distress and anger, then try to understand her situation. He became more suspicious and it reached a stage where he did not even believe my friend's witness. Why should you look good for strangers in the streets but look messy before your wife and children? To make your husband a romantic person, do well on bed when you serve him. 12. He then added: 'She thinks just as you do'." Looking good is the first step of satisfying your husband. 73, "The Prophet (S) of Islam also stated: 'A dirty person would be a bad worshipper of Allah'." The Prophet (S) stated to this man: 'It would suffice you only to order them to do those things that you have to do yourself and to forbid them from those deeds that you yourself should abstain from'." "O you who believe! One of the points for men to remember is that generally their mothers, sisters and brothers, despite their apparent friendship, do not enjoy a good relationship with their wives. It is wrong to deprive them of their rights or to turn them into puppets. My step-mother used to beat me up and even burnt me with a hot metal rod on a few occasions. A child is the fruit of a marriage. What difference does it make if you have a girl or a boy? If a woman tells a lie about a relationship, or hides her letters, it may be that there is a good reason for it or she may fear her husband's groundless accusations. "Imam Ali (a.s.) stated: 'Whoever exposes himself to accusation, must not blame those who become suspicious of him'."60. Pitiful are those men, who for a few moments of lust, chase after corrupt women and leave their own chaste wives, as if they have never known family love and sincerity. Let him know that his interest is your interest too. Love Them As Your Own Family When you are getting married, you should be accepting of your partner's family too. If he sees his wife talking to a man, or finds a photograph of a man among her belongings, or finds a letter written to her by a man, or finds a man looking at her, he would reach certainty with respect to her unfaithfulness. Why is it that when people get married the women has to do what the man says ? There are men who are shamelessly unfair. The woman becomes depressed and loses interest in her husband and family. If they argue, then the judge should decide on the number of times, just as the judge should decide on the level of spending on a wife. (Al-Ikhtiyarat al-Fiqhiyyah, p. 246). 9What is a husband duties to his wife? Too much strictness is harmful. Do not tease her. This will help her develop trust for him and she will feel at ease. It may be a small thing, but it means so much to him. But sadly not every men are born romantic, so wives should know the ways how to make husband romantic in Islam. Then they should both decide to correct themselves; but only if they feel the necessity for deep understanding and where they both long to revive their love and tranquility which once existed between them. His parents, who have worked hard to bring him up, expect him to be helpful to them in their old age. Don't point out his flaws every time and think of how hard he's been trying for the family instead. On the contrary she will dislike such an attitude but may not express it. A woman has to work hard even if that is at the expense of her house and family. You should not, specifically inform your mother or sister because they would naturally be in agreement with you and thus increase your suspicion. 3- Don't let many people know about what your husband is doing. Hence we see chaos in the societies which go against that: men do not shoulder the responsibility of spending on their wives, and wives are not obliged to obey their husbands; they go out of the home whenever they want and leave the marital nest empty and neglect their children. She said her husband was more interested in his parrots and that was why she did not want to live with him any longer."3. It also recommended you to recite the dua below in abundance. A disobedient woman can be punished by her husband. She works for you and your children's comfort and thus expects you to value her efforts and to respect her. Well you may think that you cannot blame other people or the world for your mishaps, so when you come home, you try to vent your anger out on your wife and children. It destroys a friendly atmosphere and causes annoyance. You then become furious and shout at every body, abuse them, hit the children, and so on. Hence Islam made the husband the protector and maintainer of the wife and gave him the responsibility of heading the household, because he is more perfect in rational thinking than her in most cases. Let him socialize with his friends and spending some time hanging out with them. A man, who treats his wife well, will make the atmosphere of his family life warmer and will strengthen its foundations.